Day 4 Post Surgery

I have less swelling today which means I can fit my glasses on over the dressing. I am still dizzy and today I have been more so. Naps are improving in length which helps. I am still only eating soup and drinking gingerale. I have numbness on the right side of my head that I am told will last a while. It feels like when you have your wisdom teeth out. All in all doing really good so far 🙂

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Day 3 Post Surgery

Still feeling dizzy and nauseated. Sleeping in one hour naps and all night long. Still, I feel pretty good considering. Some discomfort/pain but overall not too bad. Right ear is numb, right side of face and tongue feels like I had my wisdom tooth pulled. I also have swelling under my right eye and bruising.

Bandages came off today and my hair was washed. It feels so much better! It doesn’t look too bad but will see when the dressing comes off. I still have to wear my contacts since my glasses don’t fit over the dressing, which is a bummer since my contacts are irritating me.

I have lost 6 pounds already, from only being able to eat soup and drink gingerale. Numbness on right side and pain when I chew keeps me from having anything really substantial. Eating a banana means nibbling at it like a mouse lol.

I’ve been asked if I can hear anything yet. No, I cannot hear anything, not until the device is activated and I have my processor on. That will be May 22nd when I go back to get the device activated and programmed. I cannot wait for that. I expect people to sound tinny and robot like, or as the ex said like Mickey Mouse. So right now I can only hear out of the left ear when the hearing aid is on.

It doesn’t seem different than a few days ago when I wasn’t wearing the right hearing aid, and yet there is a difference somewhat. The right ear no longer hears anything the conventional way through the ear, and my hearing aid (which I wouldn’t be able to put on, as the ear is swollen too).

Counting down the days to May 22nd now 🙂

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Day 2 Post Surgery

It is 6 am, and I am awake after sleeping fitfully all night. Waking every hour and half. The painkiller has me feeling woozy and nauseated, it sure packs a wallop! I plan to switch to Tylenol Ones during the day which is enough for the pain and doesn’t leave me feeling too out of it.

I have some swelling on the right side of my neck below my ear and my right eye looks a tad droopy. I guess the facial nerve controlling that is impacted a bit, probably from the swelling.

I cannot wait to get the headband bandage off, its annoying and the tape is peeling away, catching my hair in it. My neck itches where there is tape and its all I can do to not tear it off. I can’t wear my glasses yet because of the bandage so I have put my contacts in. I don’t wear them much and they are irritating my eyes a little as a result and from being a bit dehydrated. I need to drink more fluids today.

I have had a lot of ringing in my ear. Lots of weird sounds I didn’t expect to hear from the tinnitus. I actually “see” these ringings as big circles happening. Makes it hard to sleep :/

All in all I feel pretty good, and better than I’d expected. Only managed to eat a banana (nibbled at it like a mouse) and some of my Taco Beef Soup yesterday. It is hard to open my mouth wide enough on the right side, much less chew.

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Day 1 Post Surgery

Its been almost 24 hours since I went under. Waking up was hard..had to be told to breathe.. it was hard at first.. since I also get sick every time I woke up.. I woke frequently naturally.. but gradually began to sleep better. Did not feel much pain.. until i popped the ear drum. Now every time I burp or swallow, I feel it twinge. ouch.  I had visitors yesterday, my parents and my hubby. They could not let our baby in though 😦 which really sucked as I was missing him.

My head has bandages wrapped all round. Lots of padding on the right side, which made it feel heavy. I took a picture of my “before surgery” look and my “temporary hair do” look with the bandages. Will take another picture when the bandages are removed.. to check out what he shaved off, and determine how badly I will need another hair cut in a few weeks lol. I also cannot wear my glasses because of the bandages.. sucks.. no tv to entertain me lol.. makes lipreading harder.. and can barely see as I type this LOL.

Most of my dizziness was yesterday.. I slept for 2 hours after getting dropped off at home by my parents. Have been up an hour and half so far.. and feeling ok.  I hear lots of blood rushing in the ear, and tinnitus, ringing sounds.. which is annoying but at least not constant. Planning to nap often though.. My little one was happy to see me but was unsure it was Mommy at first.. He was all smiles and so adorable. I really missed him  yesterday.

So day one so far isn’t too bad, especially now that I stopped throwing up (BLECH). Have not tried to eat yet, brushing my teeth was a bit difficult to manage lol. Looks like a mostly liquid diet, drinks and soup for a few days. Maybe I will lose some weight out of the deal, one can only hope eh?

Morning of the Surgery

I am ready. I think. I have everything needed packed. Which is not much. Being ready to go under.. is another story. My folks just arrived and Dad asked me if i was ready to go… how ironic! Just a few hours to go (less than five) and I will be under.. and changing my life drastically. 

It is really unfair that my parents stopped at Tim Horton’s for coffee and then Mc’Ds for egg mcmuffins. So hungry and I can’t have anything! *sigh* such torture!!!

Final Night… and Thoughts

Tonight is my last night as a bi-aural aided person. It is 11pm.. and I sitting here eating what may be my last meal for over 24 hours.. My surgery is scheduled for one pm tomorrow .. and I have to be at the hospital by 1030am.  I am so nervous, anxious and terrified. I will have a couple hours wait for my surgery, which will seem interminably long and nerve-wracking, even if i distract myself reading an e-book.

The doctor will shave part of the right side of my head.. my hair is going to look rather unbalanced in length. I may end up cutting it all shorter when it heals, just so it does not look funny. I will have a scar, that I am betting will look like a Nike Swoosh (going by the ex’s scar for the C.I.).

I worry that this won’t work, and that I have made a mistake. It is one thing to elect to have a tummy tuck, or liposuction or a face lift. While I have elected to do something that should ultimately improve things for me hearing wise, I have also elected to lose the residual hearing remaining in the right ear. That is a difficult thing to reconcile and accept. I try to look at the positive outcome..which is that it SHOULD give me more hearing than my hearing aids do. It will not give me normal hearing like anyone else has.. when I am not wearing the processor, I will not hear a thing in that ear. Only when I wear the processor will I hear.

My kids are worried for me.. and at the same time excited for the possibilities. My hubby is nervous too. He will not be there, as he has to work. He’s been trying to reassure me that our son will be fine, and will cope with my absence. His brother is here to help for a couple of days, which reassures me. My parents will be taking me to and from the hospital and then stay the rest of the week.

I hate having surgery. I have had 3 tube surgeries for my ears, one wisdom teeth surgery, surgery to remove a ovarian cysts, a laparoscopy to remove another (which he could not do), and three caesarean sections. This will make my tenth surgery total, and the 7th for which I go under anaesthesia. That is the scary part, allowing yourself to go into the nothingness, the blackness, of the “sleep” during surgery, and waking from it is so disorientating. Electing to undergo that experience is different from having to for medical reasons, but still scary nonetheless.

My last night… tomorrow my life will change irrevocably .. and I will embark on a new journey in my life.. in my quest to make the most of what I have with my hearing .. and hopefully gain more than I have in the years since I first started wearing hearing aids.

Two More Sleeps! WOW

As I sit here with my older two children, showing my site, I realize the value of being able to communicate with them easily, with no frustrations or repetition (and not just them either.. I repeat over and over as well!). My children are the reason I am going through this surgery. I want to be able to have conversations without wondering what I heard them say, or whether I am about to say something that makes NO SENSE AT ALL to the conversation at hand. I am frequently known for doing this. My youngest is currently having his bottle.. and he is the one I most want to be able to understand from the get go.. I hear his “words” and can tell sometimes what he might be trying to say. I enjoy that he now mixes up the sounds he has learned and practiced into “sentences and stories”. It is so fascinating. 

My hubby is in the kitchen and I wish I could carry conversations with him through the pass through without having to move closer to lipread him. While I am proud of what I have accomplished in my life, I crave normalcy. I know the C.I. won’t give me normalcy, but it might bring me closer.

I love my family so much.